SCROLL DOWN TO READ THE FOLLOWING ARTICLES BY GABRIEL GONZALEZ:
NEW! A Visit....Heaven and Hell ~ By Carolina Soza-Gonzalez (scroll down)
Super Max Security Prisons and the Torture of Sensory Deprivation
Evidentiary Hearing for Gabriel Gonzalez
Death Penalty
Divide and Conquer
The Seconds Theory
Globalizing the Movement
My Love and Rage
Speaking of the Dead
A Visit...Heaven and Hell
Carolina Soza-Gonzalez
Saturday has finally arrived. I will see my husband today for 30
minutes. I know for most people 30 minutes would be nothing, but for us
those 30 minutes are what give us fuel, what keeps us alive.
I will start my day trying to select what to wear because I will have
just 30 minutes to make an impression on my wonderful husband. I know
that even though he will be wearing his giant carrot outfit he is now
taking a careful shower, and fixing his hair...his beautiful curly
hair… hair that I was lucky to get and that I carry around and touch
and smell every night, just so I can feel closer to him.
I will arrive to the Bexar County Jail and stand on a long line of
mostly women and kids, all looking their best. We will be under the hot
and intense Texas summer sun for at least one hour, but we don’t
care…because the anticipation of the visit with our loved ones makes us
happy….makes us smile as we share on that line some funny facts, or
anecdotes about them, about us. After one hour of equal sharing (or
simply venting) I know why the young women on back of me has that
guilty and worry look in her sweet face. She was the one that called
the police when her partner started beating her father up. “but what
can I do?! I love both of them…and I am sure Bobby hates me now!” I
give her a none judgmental hug while I reflect on how I never imagined
I would be on that line, in that position. You see, we leftist
activists with an education are not supposed to get involved with the
people we work for! But what do you do when you find the love of your
life, an intelligent, sensitive, socially conscious, compassionate
human being, that happens to be in prison? Do you leave him just
because “it is not right”? Are we activists above all the ones we work
for? Doesn’t that idea defy the main concept of equality we fight for?
What if you decide to stay with him regardless of the judgment you know
will come? Some will ask themselves, “Does she really know him?” “is
this the result of some trauma from her childhood?” “Is he using her?”
“Does she have killer instincts?.”
Oh! Now the young boy that has been crying, on and off the entire time
while cleaning the whole sidewalk with his clothes, has run to the
street again. But we, all his new 100 adopted mothers, are looking
after him while his mom feeds the baby she carries in her arms and her
oldest daughter talks, to everyone that wants to hear her, about her
dad.
The officer in charged of the visit (a man with whom I have had many
conflicts with in the past) comes out with the numbers. Little by
little we start entering the building, passing through the metal
detector, answering stupid questions, ready to make another line in the
inside. I actually don’t want problems today so I try to smile to the
hipermacho-dizzie-with-power supervisor. I don’t think my smile looks sincere but OH WELL!
The woman with the three children is stopped at the door. They informed
her that she cannot enter with 3 children but 2. She cries (we
cry)….and has to make a decision. Her two oldest are asking for dad so
she decides to leave baby with one of her new line friends.
The woman that was wearing the sleeveless t-shirt is sent to change her
clothing for being too revealing. Usually you would receive the number
and you will go change (always bring extra clothes to visits because
you never know what the workers at the prison will find too revealing)
but in this case the supervisor decides not to give her a number. She
will have to go change and make the line one more time. No complaining.
If you get on his bad side you will be banned…..who is willing to pay
the cost of that? I am almost doing it….but I want to see my baby too
bad…
I stand on the line inside. I put a jacket on top of my dress, just in
case. I get to the front and tell the officer that I am from out of
town so I get an 10 extra minutes (yes! Locals are allowed 20 minutes/2
visits per week for everyone though, including me) and they need to
write it on the pass, if not I will not be allowed to see my baby for
30 minutes, and I will be frustrated, and he will be furious….
I get my pass; go to the bathroom before getting in the elevator. The
bathroom has 2 stalls. One does not have a door, and the other one does
not have a lock. This has been the same for years.
I get on the elevator, which is controlled by a guard looking through a
camera. Sometimes he will ask you what floor you are going to or he
will have you inside the close elevator until he wants to. You need to
shout the floor, no buttons, and no control. When I am near a panic
attack, the guard decides to take me to the sixth floor.
The sixth floor is where those who are considered the worst of the
worst prisoners are. All the “dangerous” people, all the prisoners that
fight, or are punished will be on that floor. So there it is constant
screaming and very little peace, if peace is possible in such a place.
Gabriel is placed on a booth segregated, alone. The rest of the
prisoners will sit next to each other and their relatives and friends
will also be next to each other on the other side of the Plexiglas.
My husband arrives handcuffed and shackled. He looks strong though.
Gabriel is a warrior, nothing breaks him, and I can clearly see in his
eyes his determination to fight until the end, which makes me love him
much more.
We are finally face to face….we look at each other and at that moment
the walls disappear, the guards are invisible and it is just Gabriel
and Carolina. We kiss; I can feel him kissing my entire face as I do
the same. I trace his face with my finger, those lips, those
eyebrows….then I put my face against his hand trying to merge and pass
through the glass, we become one…we are one….and we will stay with our
faces stuck to the glass for the rest of the visit. We will be talking
to each other as close as we can be, sharing laughs, tears, and kisses
as we talk softly and sweet reminding, confirming and reassuring each
other that we won’t go anywhere, that we will fight all the way, that
if he goes I will go….that not even death will separate us…
20 minutes pass and they cut the phone line…. I go outside the booth,
tell the officer that I am from out of town. He states that the pass
does not give me approval to stay 30 minutes. My heart sinks but I
won’t go without getting my 10 extra minutes. I get in the elevator, I
stand on the line, get to the front and YES! THE supervisor is there. I
explained to him what happened and I say that it is my right to get my
extra ten minutes. He starts yelling at me “ARE YOU DEMANDING THE 10
MINUTES OR REQUESTING THEM?!” “it is my right” I say….so he goes to
Gabriel’s information on the computer, asks me for my ID and takes for
ever reading his information and checking if I am on his list. He asks
me where I live, I reply that my address is on the ID he has on his
hand and also on Gabriel’s visitation list. He asks me many questions
in a very loud and mad voice. He finally gives me a pass for 10
minutes. The 10 minutes are written in giant letters and highlighted;
just in case the guard upstairs has the audacity of given me 2 extra
minutes.
I get back on the elevator….wait for the operator to feel like moving it, get on the six floor, give the
pass to the guard, and I am able to see Gabriel for 10 more minutes.
I do not want to explain to Gabriel what just happened because 10
minutes will fly! He is mad and wants to know the name of each person
that I feel mistreated me. HE, my husband and protector, my best friend
and comrade is always looking after me. I know it, but not now
please…..not now….I will write you all the information, just let me
enjoy this moment….and that is how we get back to our world.
I come out of the visit crying….I scream outside those walls
“GABRIIIEEEEELLLLLL, I LOOOOVEEE YOUUUU”, I walk broken hearted but
certain of the path I chose. I also know that on Monday we’ll have our
last visit and I start waiting for it, with mixed feelings. I want
Monday to come and I don’t want Monday to come. After Monday’s visit I
will go directly to the airport. I will feel empty, my heart and my
soul will stay in San Antonio….for the following couple of days life
will seem to have no meaning. Just my two wonderful boys and the work I
do with youth already marked by a criminal record will feed my soul.
Young Gabriels trying to make it.
Later on the week I will be back….not totally, EVER, but back….ready to
fight, ready to stand up against any injustice, as I start planning my
next visit to San Antonio, to Livingston, to heaven and hell…to any
place Gabriel, my heart, takes me.
The History, Use and Effects of Control Units
A control Unit is a prison within a Prison. It is a place where people are placed not for what they have done, but rather for who they are and what they believe. While specific conditions in control units may vary, the goal of the unit is to disable prisoners through spiritual, physiological and/or physical break down. Along with arbitrary placement, a control Unit, especially the ones like Texas death row (Polunsky Unit) is marked by years of isolation from both the prison and outside communities while being caged in solitary or small group isolation. Those of us in these units are forced to be confined 23 to 24 hours a day in complete sensory depravation.
The use of solitary confinement in US Prisons began in 1829 and it soon became evident that people in isolation often suffered mental breakdown. Thus, the general practice of isolation in US prisons was abandoned soon after, however, the federal government has justified its building of the new isolation prisons we see today by stating that it houses the “most predatory” of US prisoners….this is a lie!
The development of control units can be traced to the tumultuous years of the Civil Rights Movement, the Vietnam War, African American, Latino, and American-Indian movements, as well as the Prisoners’ Rights Movement. By 1974, both the federal prison in Marion, Illinois and the California Prison System had isolated sections called ‘Control Unit”. As of 2009, more than 200 control units or Control Unit prisons have opened across the US to the point where Human Rights Watch concluded in its report on “Prison Conditions in the United States” that perhaps the most troubling aspect of the human rights situation in US prisons is a trend we observe that could be labeled Marionization…”the confinement is administered by prison officials without independent supervision and leads to a situation in which inmates may in fact be sentenced twice; once by the court to certain period or sentence of imprisonment; and the second time by the prison administration, to extremely harsh conditions. This second sentencing is open ended – limited only by the overall length of an inmate’s sentence – and is imposed without the benefit of counsel.”
When we speak about the history of control units, we also have to reflect on my comrades as well as myself from the DRIVE Movement and the many strugglers before us. I am entering my 15th year in a control unit. My comrades and I represent the thousands of people who have been placed in sensory depravation cages based on who we are and what we believe. In my case I am an ex gang member who politicized myself in prison after I politically and socially educated myself here. For those of you who may not understand the root of gangs, gangs are a congenial brotherhood/sisterhood amongst many of the disenfranchised of society that are born out of social injustice. They are not intended to be criminal empires. They are groups of oppressed people unaware of who they are spiritually, culturally, socially, politically, etc. They are also unaware of the socio-political nature of their social injustice. For that reason they live a reactionary life style simply trying to survive. Their lack of education makes them equivalent to a person blind folded and repeatedly spun around to the point of extreme dizziness and left alone to find their way through the dark maze as best as they can with no guidance. Because gang members rebel against their social injustice unconsciously, the very same government who imposes injustice understands that if that self-destructive rebelliousness were to be organized with the proper knowledge about our injustice force would conducively organize and be a worthy opponent against an oppressive government who oppress people for the sake of economical gain and social control. Thus gang members are the product of social injustice and are simply social and spiritual revolutionaries waiting to happen. This is why gang members are also caged in control units.
Through out the US, we also see in these control units former members from many social revolutionary movements: former Black Panthers, former members of the Black Liberation Army, Puerto Ricans fighting for independence, members of the American Indian Movement, The Cuban 5, jailhouse lawyers and prison activist, etc. the most predatory prisoners, as the government would have you believe.
The history of control units is unalterably entwined in the history of those who have opposed the social problems of the government. In 1978, Andrew Young stated that US prisons held “hundreds, maybe thousands of people I would categorize as political prisoners.” The outcry from the government was deafening and Andrew Young was forced to retract his statement.
The government , however, has acknowledged developing an intelligence program called “COINTELPRO” ( Counter Intelligence Program) which had as its objective the crippling of all radical forces of the poor and people of color fighting for social justice in the sixties and seventies by COINTELPRO using lies, infesting the poor communities of color with drugs, guns, and divide and conquer tactics – and it is no accident that the advent of the control units parallels the use of the COINTELPRO by government forces.
The death penalty is also part of this government apparatus to eradicate all who oppose social injustices, as well as those with the potential to be cultivated to stand up against state oppression. Control Units and the death penalty are clearly state punishment, torture, and murder – a neo-institution of chattel slavery. They embody the central threat to human rights that the constitution was intended to check – arbitrary state power. And it is the growing use of the arbitrary state of power which is so frightening to me.
The treatment and surveillance that control units prisoners endure is worse than inhumane. It is physical and psychological torture, and murder. If we dig deeper into the existence of such practices, the political purpose they serve is inescapable. Police, the courts, and the prison system all serve as social control mechanisms.
Prison reflects both the structure of a society and the nature of its struggle against the injustices of that structure. Many of the men and women living in control units are visionaries for a more just, human and none racist society. For the most part we are political dissidents, prison activists and jailhouse lawyers. It is clear that the government has attempted to build a wall of silence around us. But we must be determined to knock those walls down and turn them into bridges that unite us and make us an unconquerable force of resistance against this injustice. Not surprisingly, those of you beautiful and courageous people out there who speak out on our behalf often find yourselves under some form of government surveillance. Stay strong!
The overall situation in the US in terms of growth of control units, the conditions in them and the number of people being caged in isolation/sensory depravation is worsening. I have come to understand, not only through study but also through living this nightmare, that the politics of the police, the courts, the politics of the prison system, the politics of the control units, and the politics of the death penalty is the politics of class genocide and social control – and it effects everyone of us in ways that are “a call to action! “
The Criminal Justice System that operates these dungeons of human sacrifice need to examine their ability to continue to function as they have been functioning. Congress needs to strongly exercise its oversight authority over the Bureau of Prisons. Above all, though the people – both outside and in – need to recognize that as “THE PEOPLE” we have the power and as brothers and sisters we have the responsibility to obtain the facts and act on the knowledge gain…
Super Max Security Prisons andthe Torture of Sensory Deprivation The U.S. criminal justice system is remarkably ineffective, absurdly expensive, grossly inhumane and riddled with racism. The slaughter of youth of color characterizes many big city police departments. The sentencing practices have led to the imprisonment of over 2 million people in state and federal facilities, with another over three and a half million under other forms of social control.
The use of sensory deprivation as a form of behavior modification began as an experiment with the political prisoners of America-- members of the Young Lords Party, Puerto Rican Independistas, The Black Panther Party, the American Indian Movement, white members of the Plowshares, the Black Liberation Army, Muslims, jailhouse lawyers and prison activists were suddenly removed from the general population and placed in isolation. They are placed there for who they are and what they believe. The former warden of Marion Penitentiary as been openly quoted as saying that the purpose of a control unit is to control revolutionary attitudes in the prison system and society at large.
There is no way to articulate the excruciating torture of sensory deprivation. Picture living in a cage about the size of a bathroom. You are there 23 hours a day, day in and day out, year in and year out. You are allowed one hour out in a cage the size of a tiny livingroom. You are allowed one five minute phone call every 6 months that is monitored. Your mail and reading material is maliciously scrutinized and censored. When leaving your cage, one is subjected to a dehumanizing strip search which includes a genital and anal probe and then handcuffed. you are completely under the control of prison guards who carry pepper gas and long,black batons some refer to as “spic and nigger beaters.” Sensory deprivation and isolation are brain washing techniques which are no accident. The world of control units and supermax prisons is a world in which isolation and segregation for for long, indefinite periods of time (or permanently) has led to a psychological brutality of ugly proportion. The expanded use of these units has led Human Rights Watch, Amnesty International and the World Organization Against Torture/USA to cite the U.S. with their concerns. Their use of isolation units breaks the United Nations covenant Against Torture and the United Nations Covenant for the Treatment of Prisoner, both of which the United States has signed.
The political function they serve is inescapable. The police, the courts and the prison system all serve as social control mechanisms. The economic function they serve is equally as chilling.America is enchanted with this form of neo-lynching and slavery. The wall of silence that has been built around death row and prisons in general, as well as prisoners has got to be broken down (see www.drivemovement.org for full information on how to break the wall). We need organizers for public demonstration and education, community groups and churches and mosques, grassroots organizations to help the community mobilize against this torture and dehumanization, attorneys to litigate unjust and inhumane prison conditions and policies, letter writers, media campaigns, people who will become a nation-wide emergency response network for phone calls, faxes, emails, and intervention by seeking to meet with prison committees and administrations when we protest conditions, treatment and brutality.
Prisons are one of the largest growth industries in the U.S. at this time. It is no accident that the technological revolution has been accompanied by the largest explosion of prison-building in the history of the world. The expansion of the prison systemin America has been a boom to everyone from architects, to plumbers,electricians and food vendors, all with one thing in common -- a gourmet paycheck earned off the backs of free prisoner labor and execution. With the full cooperation of politicians and media, the public is being sold a “War on Crime” and a “War on Drugs” as thecure for the constantly hawked, yet non-existing rising rate of crime. Prison issues are class issues-- therich exploiting the poor for economical gain. The insidious crippling mostly ofour poor, young people on death rows and prisons is expanding, and none of this is about the rate of crime. It is about capitalism, it is about racism and classism.
Support the DRIVE Movement to endthe death penalty and the torture of sensory deprivation, inhumane conditions and prison abuse. Inaction in the face of injustice is acceptance and collusion with state oppression and state sanctioned murder. Say no to the death penalty! Say no to control and isolation units and the torture of sensory deprivation!
EvidentiaryHearing for Gabriel Gonzalez
Texas never manages to surprise me with all the judicial curtailing they do to cover how they obtain illegal convictions on innocent people. I’ve often hear from people who sent me “congratulations’ after I was granted a resentencing hearingon 10-18-06. And though I –quiet naturally- understand that my family, friends and comrades are merely happy because they all realize that I have evaded the“Texecution Machine”” (which means we’ll get to be a part of each others lives as long as possible), the fact of the matter is that even though I have been granted a re-sentencing hearing, which will allow me to live longer- it is undoubtedly a deeper miscarriage of justice by the Texas Judicial System to cover up the fact that they intentionally and illegally convicted and sentenced to murder, a completely INNOCENT MAN.
Afteran evidentiary hearing in 1997 to admit “exculpatory” evidence (evidence to my favor, that points to my innocence) into my appeal that had been with held from my defense by the prosecutors, the trial court refused to grant me a new trial(quite naturally since they illegally convicted me to begin with, and they refuse to rectify their wrong).
AfterwardsI remained pending in the Criminal Court of Appeals (CCA) for over six years.The CCA, in their attempt to conceal the fact that they prosecutors, in their prosecution of me withheld exculpatory evidence from my trial attorney that would have led to my acquittal, ignored that no physical evidence what so ever links me to this crime, that the prosecutors coerced people to lie against me in my trial – completed circumvented my innocence claim in my appeal (which proves all that I am saying) and only granted me a re-sentencing hearing instead of a “full new trial” on the premises that my trial attorneys were ineffective because they failed to thoroughly investigate my mitigation circumstances. They however, really know I am innocent. They also know that in a new trial, how corrupt the prosecutors got to illegally convict me would be exposed. This leads to a political fiasco of the magnitude of that the prosecutor from North Carolina, Mike Nifong, whom illegally tried to prosecute the three DukeUniversity Lacrosse players. The exculpatory evidence- The DNA evidence that undoubtedly exonerates the three defendants, the lies he told in the grand jury hearing, the lies he told to the trial judge- were fortunate discovered before the three innocent men could be judicially railroaded by a political ambitious,power drunk prosecutor (the same type of prosecutor I had on my case). The reason these men were saved and the prosecutor was disbarred, and is being held accountable despite “the color of the state” law, was because they come from prestigious families, with the financial means and the political clout to ensure their justice and apply a sort of political pressure to make the staterectify its judicial indiscretions. That situation got so controversial that now prosecutors are battling legislation that could take some power from them,create a venue to monitor prosecutors, and hold them accountable for their prosecutorial abuse (which had previously made them completely immune under the“color of the state” law). That case has also caused the general public to scrutinize and question the prosecutor’s office, which in turn will have a domino effect on other counties, cities, sates, as previous convictions will be reopened and investigated by for “prosecutorial abuse.”
ThoughI do not come from a prestigious family with the economical means and political clout to apply that sort of pressure that would ensure my justice – as in this country it is about how much one can afford for justice already promised by the law regardless of class, race, gender, or political belief and association,rather than following the law- in a new full trial how corrupt prosecutors got to “illegally convict me” if exposed in the media (as it would be) with supportof staunch supporters and activists beside me, it could cause that same sort of political fiasco that would leave the entire San Antonio DA’s office exposed. Decades and decades of judicial corruption would be exposed; prosecutors and judge’s careers would be ruined and lost. To conceal the state’s corruption my“innocence claim’ was ignored and denied; and I was granted a resentencins hearing only. SO IT STILL REMAINS A MISCARRIAGE OF JUSTICE AS LONG AS MY FULL JUSTICE (A FULL NEW TRIAL) IS DENIED.How murderous and sadistic this judicial system is that it would rather kill an innocent man or imprison him for the rest of his natural life just to cover their illegal actions in their “by-any-means-necessary” climb up the political and economical ladder.
Because I understand this, I realize –undoubtedly- that if federal court actually saw the merits of my appeal (especially my innocence claim) they would VERY LIKELY grant me the full new trial I am due by law. This is why the state only granted me the re-sentencing hearing – it would stop my appeal from going further at the moment (namely to federal court)). The state doesn’t want federal court to see my case. The state doesn’t want a federal court to see my case. The state’s hope is that the will, this time, re-sentencing to “life without parole” (a death sentence nonetheless whether it’s “death” or “life without parole”). If they do without a state imposed death sentence, federal court would not be obligated to appoint me, as an indigent defendant, an attorney. I Know this because I already filed a motion for “Appointment of Counsel” to Federal court,so I could proceed with my federal appeal immediately in order to circumvent my unjust sentencing hearing and get a full new trial from federal court. They told me they are not obligated to appoint me counsel because I no longer have a death sentence and I would have to retain my own attorney.
If sentence to ‘life without parole”, I will have one year to file my federal appeal challenging my wrongful conviction. If I were not able to raise the money to retain an attorney to file my federal appeal within that one year, myf ederal appeal would become void. That means that by law I would not be able to file any more appeals thus leaving me imprisoned –mouth legally gagged, hands and feet legally bound-for the rest of my life for a crime I never committed.This is what the state wants in order to cover up how they illegally convicted and sentenced to death and innocent man.
SOME FACTS ABOUT MYCASE
It was a pawnshop robbery where the owner was killed during the course of the robbery.
* No physical evidence whatsoever links me to this crime.
* No murder weapon was ever recovered.
* All physical evidence points to the witnesses who testified against me (and they admitted guilt)
* The prosecutor intentionally withheld, from my defense, contradicting statements made by the guilty state’s witnesses directly to the prosecutor where they admitted guilt and after being coerce, by the prosecutor, changed those statements and blamed me in order to save themselves and help the prosecutor to illegally convict me.
We must not let this injustice continue! We must seize the time and quickly rise to the occasion! As of yet I do not have a set court date. I was transferred to San Antonio at this time more so for my political activity as a member of DRIVE on Polunsky Unit against the death penalty and inhumane conditions (Ianticipate being here a while).
This injustice could be halted, but it will take paying the appeal attorney $25.000 to file the federal appeal which would automatically stop the re-sentencing process while federal court reviews my case. If they rule in my favor and grant me a full new trial, their ruling would over rule the state’s ruling thus making the re-sentencing hearing void and forcing the state to retry me in a full new trial, which would give me theopportunity to expose the exculpatory evidence hidden from my defense by the prosecutor in my first trial (and prove my innocence). If anyone would like to speak to my attorney and verify his price and are interested in donating, they can contact him about it at:
LawOffice of Michael C. Gross
MichaelC. Gross 106 south St. Mary’s Street, suite 260 SanAntonio, TX 78205 Phone:210-354-1919 Fax: 210-354-1920
You can also send money orders/checks to Carolina Soza-Gonzalez.
Send them to: P.O.BOX 71199 Shorewood, WI53211-1199
It’s sad to know that the quality of one’s justice is determin by how much one can afford to pay for it. Nonetheless until we are able to change this broken system, we must try our best to ensure the justice of those wrongfully convicted like Kenneth Foster, Rob Will, and Reginald Blanton, countless many others like myself. As of late, due to technological advancements in DNA testing, 200 people have been exonerated from prison. This exemplifies how flawed and corrupt the judicial system is (see the Houston, Texas crime lab fiasco for references). In Texas a total of 123 people have been exonerated and released from death row. Yet they refuse to abolish the death penalty. 38 states still practice the death penalty. How many innocent people have been executed by this flawed man-made system? How many still remain innocent in prison or on death row? Countless! Help me become one of the illegally condemned whom obtains his justice due to FREEDOM!!!!!
The Death Penalty
Daylight and dark chase each other’s tails on their primeval schedule, but inthe Texas Death Row cage one is indistinguishable from the other. It is a cycle without meaning, alterations of the rhythms of the air defining each one’s arrival and departure, their only import being that on some level of the mind the realization that another day has passed clicks home. There is tedium,sensory starvation, and in its unending quest for stimulation the mind avails itself of fantasy-spawned dances and shows, for beyond these lie tunnels of nothingness whose walls are spiked with grief, non-existence in being, silence in noise. Memories, should one be blessed with fond ones, provide some escape from the reality of the Texas Death Culture, but they are manipulated by time and eventually resemble fantasies, assuming they don’t yield to forget fulness and fade to obsolescence. There is no line of demarcation between the recalled real and the imagine unreal. More tangible distractions are the sounds of madness. Men who have for gone the struggle for sanity scream and pound steel doors, in guttural or tearful language demanding acknowledgement of what they deem their needs to be. Sometimes I listen to the pleas, at times incongruous and nonsensical, and watch through the slit of my cage door as pickets officers lie a top an instrument panel to sleep or amuse themselves by making fun of the crazy person’ noise. Itis a source of mirth for them, a story wretchedly embellished to be told to friends and paramours in bars or bedrooms, a threat, like tales of the bogeyman, to encourage children to obey. I have been on Death Row almost a decade and it has always been bad, but never this bad. I have watched over 200 men and 2 women murdered by the State of Texas, which is sad enough for one attempting to understand the passion Amerikans have for state-sanctioned killing, but equally sad is the erosion of the humanitarian attitudes that, at least outwardly, once prevailed among the prison guards and administrators.
Amerikans are tired of what they see as the coddling of criminals and have demanded that amenities once afforded prisoners, particularly those on death row, be stopped.Via the bully pulpit zealots control the electoral purse strings; consequently the prison officials have adopted the current hard line. Due to the knee-jerk passage of laws the appeal process has been accelerated (blame Bill Clinton)and its avenues of redress curtailed, and the corresponding trend is to imposeon death row prisoners maximum misery as the clock of their lives winds down.The sentiments induced on people living under these conditions cannot be fathomed, but from many conversations I have divined a hint as to their nature.One of my neighbors is young. He was 1 day short of 18 at the time of his crime and is now 24. He has been on death row for 6 years and Amerikans are prepared to sacrifice him to strengthen their belief in the utility of Capital Punishment. Even children are not safe from the illusion, propagandized by politicians and faux puritans, that killing criminals makes society safer or provides victim’ survivors an end game to their pain. To help each other conquer the monotony this lad and I often talk, accomplished with a degree of privacy by speaking around a bolt in the wall. Recently he allowed that he became so bored with staring at the ceiling that he petitioned the dental department to extract a healthy tooth. Shocked, I asked why he would make this unusual request. He replied that it was an excuse to leave the cage, plus once the anesthetic wore off he wanted to feel the ache of his denuded gum. I asked if he is into pain and he, thinking the question attended by a sexual connotation, averred that he isn’t “like that” but enjoys the adrenaline rush when he scrapes a knee, gets punched in the nose, or has a tooth pulled. This son of two heroin addicts, one of whom, his mother (with whom he confessed he shot heroin before his incarceration), is presently confined in the Texas’women prison, is so psychologically flawed that pain validates his existence.The more our keepers abase us the more this boy wants to hurt, as physical painis his method of frustrating the encroachment of emotional anguish. The guards secure in knowledge that whatever they do is sanctioned by a majority of the public, could not care less. To them the boy and his mother are garbage to be disposed of at the earliest convenience, an attitude reminiscent of the darkest periods in our world’shistory.
Insanity adopts many forms. One man, fearing that someone has poisoned his food, throws his property and prison-issued clothes and bedding onto therun, then stands naked in his cage holding forth in the voice of a proselytizer about the non-existence of death and his certainty that everyone is God. Others are self-mutilators who in the slice of a sharp object seek to escape from their duress; some use their teeth to rip open their stitches after being sewn up and drink their own blood or eat their own flesh – which underscores the warping nature of our existence, for some of the men once participated in the now discontinued Death Row Work Program, where, because of mental stimulation,social interaction, and a sense of self-worth, they functioned normally. In a few short months our maltreatment and its attendant perceptual distortions,inversion of minds, and a sense of the walls closing in has destroyed these men, turned them into self-consuming self-mutilators. The seams of their stability have burst and their shamans are not equal to the task of integrating into society’s madhouse the frail and fallen. The prison administrators are sensitive to public perception and endeavor to keep these realities from the light of scrutiny.
Becauseof the increase in psychotic behavior and suicide attempts among the prisoners, representatives of the unit psychological department are sent into the Death Row pods to attempt intervention before someone cuts him self open. They go from cage to cage and ask each occupant if he is having any problems and if so he should request an evaluation for “medication”, because zombification, as opposed to providing a milieu conducive to maintaining one’ssanity, is the prison’s method of dealing with someone whose faculties have eroded. One person was doped up for so long that because his body could not obtain the exercise or nutrition needed to combat infection he died of septic shock. After which he may have been cremated, which, as in the case of a man(also a mental patient) who died in the severe Texas heat after his fan was confiscated, the prison does to avoid questions about a suspicious death.Moreover, to keep the anti-prisoner fire well fanned, the guards, by writing false disciplinary reports and engaging in petty harassment, incite other wise calm men to misbehave so the prison spin-doctors can justify to the public the regular use of oppression. It is ironic that Amerikan media will reserve available space to report on the execution of Timothy McVeigh but will not investigate the atrocities occurring on the nation’s killingest Death Row; the shepherd charged with ensuring the safety of the sheep has given the wolves’free reign over the flock. Meanwhile our world darkens,becomes incomprehensible, and, betrayed by Humanity, we are deafened by internal voices that drown out the external ones. We who remain lucid, to penetrate the consciousness of others, must remove the muffler from the motor of our minds and belch, spit, and backfire our way into the realm of attention, otherwise lament plays in a citadel of the death while beyond the walls of our suffering superficiality clangs loudly. With the fervor of carnival barkers Amerikans demand our suffering and upon being questioned aboutthe abuses we suffer become supercilious. To distort the issue they cite our commission of a crime as ground to sunder our rights, for if we have none they cannot be abused. With artifice and clever words we are diminished to a subclass, if not a subspecies, which, as was reflected in the treatment of erst while Amerikan slaves, divests us of the protections to which we would be otherwise entitled. Capital Punishment is promoted here because those upon whom it is levied are fringe components of the ruling caste, hence are not viewed as people but vermin whose lives the elite feel justified in taking. Amerika,particularly those in the South where slavery thrived and most executions occur, is redolent of this mind set, for the residents of this romantic and secessive region feel it is more preferable to kill those who are “not us” thanto favor life and there by confirm that those who commit crimes are similar tothey, though they governed by different fortunes. The killing attitude ripples to our keepers and our vanquishment is mirrored in the cut of their eyes, the arbitrary destruction of our property, the denial of clippers with which totrim our nails, or any number of devices to aid in traducing our worth. We pace our cages and see derision oozing from the walls, hear it in the creak of stairs leading to another tier, and wonder why our brethrens have so malignedus. To be sure, many have erred, but are we the only ones? Or merely those who got caught? The keepers harrow us gladly, for our blood seeps not into the family room of any citizen; therefore it cannot assuage the malice that summonsto us the mantle of defectiveness. When Death Row prisoners were allowed to hold prison jobs, before we were hauled like branded and eventually slaughtered cattle to this more restrictive prison in 2000, my assignment was near the“Death Watch Cage,” to where men with pending murder dates were moved prior to their “date.” I said goodbye to many of these men and saw sadness, indeed fear,a futility born of resignation. The recognition of impotence, of pride stripped away, defeated, for there was nothing left worthy of pride, the price of survival in this well of torment having proved too high. I have heard in the earliest hours of the morning, when everyone should be asleep, the sobbing of a man in agony, praying for someone, perhaps an angel, to touch his shoulder andsay, “You are not fighting alone,” but knowing that the curtains of finality have dropped and brought with them the aloneness from which he fled. In these moments one thing is clarified: Suffering, by defining it, makes life authentic, not withstanding the humiliation enjoined by the blunt instrument of authority. The Italian writer Dante Alighieri provided us a graphic rendition of hell, but my experience of hell is reality. Imagine looking into the eyes ofsomeone who will be murdered in a few hours, someone you’ve known for years,and there is nothing you can do to help him. Imagine grasping for something to say and finding nothing while he relies on you to explain a system with notj ustice as its goal, but political fraternity. Imagine he and his family having their final visit, stomachs clenching with dread as the time for the guard tosay “Wrap it up!” draws near. Saying their last goodbyes, the children – who are sons and daughters, grandchildren, nieces and nephews – understand they will never see the man alive again, but do not understand why. Their wails, as adults lead them away, are ghastly. A possible rebuttal to these observations WOULD be that the condemned brought this on himself, but did his family? What transgression heralded their sorrow? The tragedy and loss inflicted by murderon the victim’s survivors is heartbreaking, but it is an act, because we are not in advance warned of its commission, we cannot stop, hence cannot prevent the legacy of loves ones left behind.
By way of contrast Capital Punishment is a process with which we are familiar, an execution being known by date, time and the condemned’s identity, yet we do nothing to stop the creation of addition angry “survivors”.
On occasion I have been told that I should stop complaining, that when a capital crime is committed the accused forfeits all claim to human rights, but this is a myopic view. One does not cease being human no matter how repugnant his mistake and remains worthy of humanitarian protections; if we fail to extend them – we risk becoming animalistic, which is the persona of violent crime we seek to transcend. If our child hits another in the head with a rock we don’tin turn strike our child, nor do we denigrate or stigmatize him, we discipline them firmly with love and compassion and understanding. I’ve heard people say that no amount of hardship a death row prisoner enduresis enough, but overlooked is the fact that these people are not sentenced to years of torture and predation, but to die. It strikes an ominous chord whenAmerikans, by endorsing the mistreatment of prisoners, feel that a person being torn from his family and forced to continually consider his death before execution is not adequate punishment. Realistically speaking, Amerikans love flexing their muscle. Amerikas ancestors decimated the Natives who held land before them. For the purpose of profiteering they exploited and killed the slaves. Amerikans killed each other in a dispute called the Civil War. Theykilled, (SUPPOSEDLY) for good reason, in World War 1, World War 2, and the Korean War, and not for good reason in the Vietnam War. The killing naturep ermeates our country’s young heart and if there are no wars to fight other Amerikans – provided they are not wealthy or influential – are sufficient targets for society’s wrath. Capital Punishment has a deleterious effect on afree society. In many states, efforts to address the problems caused by the Death Penalty are underway, but because they do not seek to abolish the system, only repair it, they are deceptions. A DeathPenalty scheme whose supporters can claim is “fixed” is a humanitarian’s the system is entrenched in the public’s mind; decades may pass before abolition momentum is resurrected.
No matter how you look at it, state-sanctioned killingis wrong because it cheapens the value of human life and promotes to society that it is alright to kill, that revenge killing is justice, which in turn judicially reinstates the code of justice by bloodshed, and in general society.I pray that the voices raised in foreign shores will continue the current renaissance in anti-death penalty thought and shame Amerika into coming to its senses.
Divide and Conquer
In Maryland, where slaves were about one third of the population in 1750, slavery had been written into law since the 1660s, and statues for controlling rebellious slaves were passed. There were cases where slave women killed their masters; sometimes by poisoning them, sometimes by burning tobacco houses and homes. Punishments ranged from whipping and branding, to execution, but the rebellion continued. In 1742, seven slaves were put to death for murdering their master in attempt to liberate themselves from slavery. Fear of slave revolt was a permanent fact of plantation life. Slavery was/is an intricate and powerful system of control that the slave owners developed to maintain their labor supply and their way of life; a system both subtle and crude, involving every device that social orders employ for keeping power and wealth where itis. As Kenneth Stamp said: “A wise slave master did not take seriously He knew that Africans freshly imported from Africa had to be broken into bondage; that each succeeding generation had to be carefully trained. This was no easy task,for the bondsman rarely submitted willingly. Moreover, he rarely submitted completely. In most cases there was no end to the need for control – at least not until old age reduced the slave to a condition.”
The system was psychological and physical at the same time. The slaves were taught discipline, were impressed again and again with the idea of their own inferiority to “know their place”, to see blackness as a sign of subordination,to be awed by the power of the slave master, to merge their interests with the slave master’s, destroying their own individual needs. To accomplish this there was the discipline of hard labor, the breakup of the slave family, the lulling effects of religion, the creation of disunity among slaves by separating the field slaves and more privileged house slaves, and finally, the power of law and the immediate power of the overseer to invoke whipping, burning, mutilationand death. However, it is now almost 150 years after physical slavery ended in1965, and in all actuality – slavery never ended. It simply changed form.Today’s slavery and lynching is prison and death row. The new brand is aprison/murder number instead of burning the skin. The new form of free labor is forced prisoner labor. The new form of lynching is the death penalty – death by legal injection or other methods. How do they justify this injustice by law? The 13th Amendment of the United
StatesConstitution states:
Section1: Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime where of the party shall have been dully convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.
Section 2: Congress shall have power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation. ”Need I say more??? I find myself encaged on TexasDeath Row, the most murderous of all death rows across the nation, subjected to inhuman conditions that have moved a group of us to take action against the attempted murder of our minds, bodies and souls…. We came together in protest against this rape of our human right to live and be treated like human beings.However, this is a repressive system. Any attempt at standing up to preserve one’s humanity is met with repression and violence. For instance, on November 3rd, 2005, I began protesting the fact that showers are unsanitary to the point of causing disease and skin fungus, unsanitary recreation yards and day rooms,malnourished food trays where we’re not getting the full amount of rations on the food trays we’re supposed to get by policy - and certain things are not given at all – there’s filthy state clothes that are causing skinrashes/funguses, lack of adequate medical care resulting in deaths of some prisoners, sensory deprivation from being completely isolated and confined to solitary – resulting in some prisoners losing all sense of self and going insane, inflicting self-mutilation and committing suicide etc., and the list can go on. This madness is why I began protesting.
My attempt to stand up for my, and others, human rights to preserve my humanity was met with violence as I occupied a recreation dayroom and refused to come out. A 5-man extraction team of guards dressed in riot helmets, bullet proof vests, elbow, knee and shin-pads with a riot shield and riot control gas were dispatched. I was gassed twice with the riot gas which made me feel as though my face and body had been set on fire, and as if someone had gripped my throat and started choking me. Nonetheless I held on determined to not participate in my oppression. The 5-man team of guards ran into the dayroom to supposedly subdue me when in reality they ran in to brutally beat my ass hoping to break my spirit! I defended myself the best I could until they cuffed and shackled me. However, even after they had me subdued, guards kept beating me while one of them was choking me. I ask for decent conditions due to me being policy here, and because I ask them to follow their policy and refuse to follow rules until they rectify the problem they brutally beat me and then accuse me of being violent? Just like an oppressor; “do as I say, not as I do!”
Not happening here! The violence was a conquer tactic. I remain
Undaunted! After they stopped punching and choking me I refused to walk. They picked me up, laid me on a gurney and rolled me down the hallway, and stripped me of my boots and clothes. I refused to walk to my cage on the punishment pod they were taking me to. I was carried to my cage by my arms and shackles. They intentionally carried me by the shackles to cause them to cut into my skin and cause pain.
I was then laid on the floor of the filthy urine and feces smelling cage,uncuffed, unshackled, and left nude in a cold cage exposed to the elements –with no property what so ever for 5 days, not even pen and paper to write my family, friends and attorney. That was a suppression tactic from the administration hoping it would repress my human – yet labeled rebellious – behavior and force me back into compliance with my oppression. Taking all my property,including my writing and legal material, was to suppress/repress my voice from exposing this injustice, hoping it breaks and conquers my hope and spirit.Undaunted I remain! I’ve come to realize that the classification leveling system on Polunsky Unit is a divide and conquer tool as well. When prisoners who are conscious of the situation stand up to preserve their humanity, and attempt to open others eyes who may not be aware of what’s really going on here, the first thing the administration does is separate that individual they consider rebellious from the rest of the population, who are, whether consciously or unconsciously, in compliance with their oppression. This is a dividea nd conquer tactic to keep those aware and fighting away from those unaware and complacent. As the saying goes “strike the keeper and the sheep will scatter”.That’s always been this system’s tactic; kill or incarcerate the aware leaders so they can keep everybody else ignorant and conquered. To further this divide and conquer tactic, the administration has put those of us protesting on level 3 status, which is the most restrictive status on the unit; recreation only 3times a week, visits only once a month (that is when they’re not turning family and friends away at the door telling them we can’t get visits because we’re protesting), no electrical appliances (except for a fan), no personal clothes or shoes, no food from the prison commissary, and only allowed to spend $10 on correspondence supplies (another repression tactic), and $10 on certain hygiene items every 2 weeks. 5 bars of 1.25 ounce soap (not an adequate amount to lastf or 14 days), 1 bottle of shampoo, 1 deodorant stick, and 1 tube of toothpaste.Can’t purchase grease or lotion for hair and skin, can’t purchase dental floss sticks to keep healthy oral hygiene, can’t purchase q-tips – simply cruel and unusual punishment. Prisoners on level 2 are allowed recreation 4 times a week,2 visits a month, personal clothes, fans (but the same commissary restrictionsas level 3). Level 1 prisoners are allowed 2-hour visits 4 times a month(including 1 special 8-hour visit monthly which level 3 and 2 inmates are not allowed), recreation 1 time a day for 1 hour, all approved electrical appliances (fan, typewriter, radio and hot pot), personal clothes and shoes, and are allowed to spend $75 every 2 weeks to buy food, postage, hygiene etc with no restrictions on hygiene products for the most part.
Here is how the administration tries to further their divide and conquer tactics through the leveling system. Aside from putting those of us protesting on level 3 away from those on level 1, hoping to keep us controlled and suppressed from spreading the word to cause a just insurrection, they further try to divide allof us prisoners who share the same struggle, by punishing those on level 1 and 2 not protesting for the acts of those of us on level 3 protesting, by locking level 1 and 2 down, along with those of us on level 3 protesting, and not allowing them to go to recreation, shower, buy food from the prison store –which all look forward to.
The administration intentionally does this to make those prisoners on level 1 and 2 mad at those of us protesting. They do it hoping that those on level 1 will be discouraged to join the protest, and hoping that it causes those on level 1 to become enemies with those of us protesting. If they can make us enemies, keep us divided and conquered,distracted by being in conflict with each other instead of united to fight the sadistic, inhumane, and indifferent administration, then they win and we lose by allowing ourselves to be divided and conquered. I hope that those of you reading this won’t allow yourselves to fall into the games and traps that the administration likes to use to keep us divided, distracted and conquered. If you’re punished when you’ve done nothing to warrant it, file grievances on“unwarranted retaliatory punishment”. Have your families and friends call, email and bombard the administration with enquiries as to why you are unwarrantedly being punished! The administration has also been using other things such as telling prisoners on level 1 that they would like to give them their phone calls, but that they can’t because some of us on level 3 are protesting.They’re lying. We all know this administration has not run any phone calls on most of these pods for about 6 months because they claim to be short staffed.Now all of a sudden they’re just eager to run phone calls for all of you on level 1 (level 3 and 2 are not allowed phone calls), but can’t because of the protest. Yeah right! Just another tactic from the administration to cause level1 to get mad at the protestors on level 3 hoping it pushes us to become enemies and fighting among each other so we can’t fight them for oppressing us when it’s them we should be fighting. This keeps the “field slave/house slave syndrome” going. Level 1 prisoners gets mad at level 3 prisoners because level 1 prisoners are being unwarrantedly punished for level 3 prisoners actions. So level 1 looks at level 3 with contempt, blaming level 3 for his punishment, and level 3 looks at the level 1 prisoners with disdain feeling them to be passive and sell outs for not doing something against the injustice (like a house slave would be looked at by a field slave for allowing himself to be pacified by being able to live in the slave master’s house with a few extra privileges than the field slaves, thus perceived as a sell out for not being in the fields/trenches organizing for full autonomy). Not all on level 3 look at level 1 like that and vice versa however, but it doesn’t have to exist at all. Those on level 1 can be in collusion with those of us protesting, they can still help by writing to the world about it, by filing grievances, asking outside supporters to call, email and bombard the administration with letters about mistreatment, writing; calling and emailing the TDCJ board about the mistreatment of the death row community in general, and how it can be changed for the better. Let’s not allow ourselves to fall victim to divide and conquer.They can only do to us what we allow them to do to us to keep us oppressed. All these things of slavery continue to affect a great many people, of all colors and genders, in a way, which not even we fully comprehend. When I look around myself and see how debilitated, devastated, humiliated, demeaned, debased and dehumanized many are here, and observe how much pride they assume while imposing their slave learned mentality upon each other, I ask myself; what is it that this state of oppression has which would cause us to prefer it to the change we could manifest? Those of us protesting, both on level 1 and 3, our love for humanity is infinite and goes without saying. Yet we are only a few ofthe gatekeepers….may many more unite with and aid and assist us.
The Seconds Theory
(The Following is an excerpt Ionce read from a book that when I often discuss it in here on death row, I liketo call it “THE SECONDS THEORY.” I hope it affects everyone who reads it the way it did me)
Imagine that you’ve won a contest,and your prize is that every morning a bank will open an account in your name containing eighty-six thousand four hundred dollars. And these are the only two rules you must follow: The first rule is that everything you fail to spend is taken from you that night. You can’t cheat, you can’t switch the unspent money to another account—you can only spend it. But when you wake the next morning,and every morning after that, the bank opens a new account for you, always eighty-sixthousand four hundred dollars, for that day. Rule number two: The bank can break off the game without warning. It can tell you at any time that it’s over,that it’s closing the account and there won’t be another one. Now what would you do?
It’s very simple: every morning when you wake up, they give you eight-six thousand four hundred dollars, on the sole condition that you spend it in one day. If you don’t spend it all by the time you go to bed, you lose the unused balance. What would you do if you were handed this prize? What does this game prove? It proves that we all have that magic bank account: It’s called “time.” A big account, filled with fleeting seconds. Every morning when we wake up, our account for the day is credited with eighty-six thousand four hundred seconds, and when we go to sleep every night, there’s no carry-over into the next day. What hasn’t been lived during the day is lost; yesterday has vanished. Every morning the magic begins again,with a line of credit of eighty-six thousand four hundred seconds. And don’t forget: we’re still playing by the 2nd rule—the bank can close our account at any time and without any warning. At any moment life can end. SO what do we do with our daily ration of eighty-six thousand four hundred seconds? Do we waist it away or do we live it to the fullest? Since my imprisonment on death row, I have realized how few people understand and appreciate the importance of time in this physical realm. Each second to me is worth everything (especially with those that I love and for the time I have to manifest a meaningful life we so often take for granted). Now more than ever, I realize the meaning of one second of life, the value of a single moment whether it’s by myself or with someone Ilove, the importance of a single word, a stare, a touch. Everything. Don’t let life pass you by, don’t forget to live LIVE and LOVE!
LOVE, LIFE & LAUGHTER…
Globalizing the Movement
We are in a high-tech information era which requires a new high-tech approach to old problems. The old street corner soap boxes, although not completely without value, have largely been replaced by satellite broadcasts; by email and web pages. With changes in the way our world operates must come changes in the way we address old concerns.
You can best believe that the self-serving robber-barons on Wall Street and the imperialists in Washington will make the most of this era's technological advancements. They will find new ways to exploit the masses, exploit natural resources and dominate the world's people. Likewise, we must make the best use of these same scientific discoveries to stop them.
Change must also be made in not only what tools we use in our daily operations, but in how we operate as well. New means must be employed to bring together the many progressive, multitudinous groups, each with their own special interests into a mega-universal fraternity where each group works together for the common benefit of all and most importantly the cause; Abolishing the Death Penalty!
When prisoners on Texas Death Row (or any Death Row) send out an S.O.S., activists, organizers, etc from anti-death penalty groups, human rights groups, socialist groups, communist groups, grassroots organizations, religious bodies of various denominations and creeds – all manners of progressives forming this proposed international progressive union around the country, despite their various idiosyncrasies, should rush to their aid and support. The sovereignty of each participating entity needs not be sacrificed in order for such a union to occur as some might fear. However, our enemies are united and whatever our individual or group cause, we will not stand a snowball's chance in the Sahara if we confront a global enemy with segmented resistance.
Activists in this new global context cannot afford to be simply organized locally. They must establish a global collective in order that their efforts may be reinforced by their allies around the world. As it’s true with other progressive groups and organizations, so it is true with prison-based groups and confined activists. Localized voices are much louder and heard much more clearly when backed by a diverse, universal chorus of powerful groups raised in their support. One of the reasons prisoners continue to be neglected and mistreated in Amerika's concentration camps is that we have no mass support base in which we can depend. Those who abuse prisoners can often do so with impunity, unafraid of consequences, except in the most sensational cases, prisoners are victimized without real remedy in the courts and without adequate assistance from local or national prison aid groups. But, if/when prisoners on death row(s) begin to make stands that are backed by the full strength and numerical might of the outside organizations, civic groups, anti-death penalty and human rights groups, progressive and political parties, student unions, international human rights coalitions, grassroots organizations, religious bodies, such a stand will be far more successful and our conditions greatly improved until the abolishment of the death penalty.
We cannot allow ourselves to entertain the foolish notion that we can be successful with separate strategic struggles apart from the vital parts of our collective. We can retain our autonomy. We can safeguard our sovereignty and we can continue to relentlessly pursue our individual group agendas while simultaneously forming larger coalitions.
Our efforts, both within and beyond prison walls must be made global or will fall short of their aims. Prisoners are the most oppresses segment of Amerikan society. We have no rights to privacy, no rights to peaceably assemble, no right to vote – and our human rights are thoroughly violated daily.
Any group which purports to be progressive and yet does not address the most pressing needs of the most oppressed people in Amerika, in fact in the world, is yet but deceiving themselves and their members. The real lovers of "FREEDOM" the true "FREEDOM FIGHTERS" are fighting for those in bondage.
It is time to build a new International Movement (thus the reason for DRIVE) which includes prison activism and prisoner activities.
COMPASSION, JUSTICE, ACTION & TRANSFORMATION,
Love and Rage
I received a letter from my best friend and comrade Maayke. In her letter she was responding to a previous letter of mine where I had written to her regarding the resistance in here against the “Murder Machine of the State”, both inside and outside, and what I felt is necessary from both the inside and outside to further the struggle against the death penalty.
I feel that in the 30 years since the death penalty was reinstated in 1976 because they claim to have found a better, more compassionate way to murder us through Lethal Injection (As if this is a compassionate way to kill – Blasphemous!), though we have had some victories, the truth of the matter is that the Anti-Death Penalty Movement has met a brick wall in the struggle that we have yet to either crumble or jump over.
We, as a Movement, have shown that the Criminal Justice System is imperfect: over 122 people facing state-sanctioned murder have been freed (many by post-conviction DNA evidence); that many prosecutors engage in unethical tactics – stepping outside the lines of the law – to win murder convictions; that many poor defendants have been represented by incompetent lawyers; more innocent people have been executed; the police brutalizes and tortures people to cop to crimes they never committed; that some courts, including the Texas Court of Criminal Appeals, are focused on process—whether appeals are filed on time, for example – rather than on justice and merits of their case. We’ve attacked the death penalty from the legal perspective, political, religious, emotional perspective and after 30 years the death penalty still exists and the state-sanctioned murder continues at an alarming rate that leaves many of us asking: What else do we do? Suffice it to say that since we’ve exhausted all other remedies in a court(s) of law, what is there left except to physically and non-violently resist the unjust establishment that continues to murder and create more victims under the pretence of justice? In my own words, this is basically what I told Maayke. And not surprisingly at all, she understood and agreed with me.
My point at the moment is not to bring up the debate of what’s wrong in the anti-death penalty movement (although there is a lot wrong that does need to be addressed). My point in bringing this up at this moment what I did was to share what I was discussing with Maayke, and to express in which state I wrote her in. In part of Maayke’s responses she told me that she can feel my determination to fight strongly, that she could practically feel my adrenaline in my letter. As always, this great and understanding woman, friend and activist reads me well – like nobody else does.
At the moment that I wrote Maayke, I was in that mode, that mode of resistance where for it is time to shut up and physically resist. I was in that mode where I felt that feeling of wishing I could just dismantle this injustice in one single act of justful rage. I often stay in that mode. The more I see this “state-induced Neo-Holocaust,” the more I resist, the more my whole being seems to become resistant against this murder madness. It seems like my whole existence is resisting this genocide.
There are many reasons why I resist state-sanctioned murder, why I resist inhumane, cruel and unusual conditions on Texas Death Row. The main reason? Self-preservation. There’s no doubt in my mind that if I ever stopped, that if I didn’t draw a line and stand up to demand my human rights, my greatest fear for myself would manifest: losing all sense of self. I never want that to happen.
I guess for me it’s like what Anna Freud said in some psychology literature Maayke sent me with her letter. Anna Freud, in “The Use of Defence Mechanisms,” said in her concept of single anxiety that, “It was not directly a conflicted instinctual tension but a signal occurring in the age of an anticipated instinctual tension.” I agree with that because it’s how I feel.
I am on E pod. B Section: 1 row; 21-cage. I’m on a section where on one row all except three of us are psyche patients. You should see this madness. Travis Greene is a man who lives two cages down from me in 19 cage. This man swears up and down that someone stole his DNA. That the FBI and CIA stole his children, and that the DNA they stole from him they are using for stem cell research and making children with his DNA to make a breed of soldiers for the Amerikan military, that would basically be called super humans who are superior due to genetic manipulation.
I don’t put it past this government to do something like that, but I know that’s not the case with Travis Greene. Travis Greene is a highly-intelligent individual. He often reminds me of German philosopher Fredrich Nietzsche who I believe attained so much knowledge that he could not emotionally consume it all. Causing him to lose his mind and slip into psychosis. It’s the same with Travis Greene. His awareness of things along with how cruelly he is warehoused on Death Row took its toll!
Travis Greene has a sensitive soul. A beautiful soul with a lot of love (I’ve heard some of the beautiful and loving visions for humanity through his conversations with me at times, and some times through his rantings and ravings by himself in his cage.) Travis Greene was not insane when he arrived on Death Row. He was physically healthy and strong, mentally sharp, very well-read in law, politics, philosophy, history, psychology and a variety of other subjects, articulates himself well, but this place has pushed him into a shell of a used-to-be man, into a shell of psychosis, deep psychosis where he rants and raves and talks to himself all day: swears they have cameras in his cage watching him 24/7; swears they are secretly spraying gas through the vent to keep him agitated and sleep-deprived; swears they are prodding his penis and anus with objects and cutting his penis and anus; swears they always knocking him unconscious with gasses; swears they have secretly knocked him unconscious and surgically embedded computer chips into his ears to control and monitor his thinking and that often the gas makes him spit profusely. He stands at the door ranting and raving about this for at least 10-12 hours a day. Sometimes he talks so fast it sounds like another language that I can’t understand because he gets carried away. He refuses to take his psyche meds and though I sympathize with him refusing to take his psyche medication for the fact that it doesn’t help. Only makes the person a passive zombie who becomes unthinking, passive and a colluder in their own oppression and state sanctioned murder. At times he’s cognizant. And at those times you would cry if you could see his brown eyes; they turn innocent and wondrous like that of a child, and his face lights up with the smile like only a 4 or 5 year old child can, and he sounds like a child at those moments when he talks. And though it hurts to see him like that, I also like to believe that those few and far between moments of cognizance in his light, his soul fighting the oppression and once in a while penetrating though darkness of his psychosis, perhaps he’ll eventually win the battle.
Sometimes all is quiet – ever Greene (surprisingly) – and abruptly, the silence is shattered by the sound of Greene’s shower slides quickly running to his cage door and you’ll hear him start, “HEY! WHY DON’T YOU MOTHERFUCKERS STOP FUCKING WITH ME? I HEAR THE MONITORS IN MY EARS GOING OFF! YALL KEEP TRYING TO WATCH ME AND MONITOR MY THOUGHTS, STICKING SHIT IN MY DICK, STICKING SHIT IN MY ASS HOLE, PUTTING CHEMICALS IN MY MOTHERFUCKING CLOTHES TO MAKE ME ITCH AND BREAK OUT, YOU KEEP TRYING TO POISON MY DNA SO I CAN’T MAKE MORE STRONG BLACK BABIES, KEEP FUCKING WITH MY FOOD PUTTING CAMERAS IN MY FOOD SO YOU CAN GET CAMERAS IN MY STOMACH AND WATCH ME! SHIT BE STUCK ALL IN MY THROAT, AND I KEEP HEARING THIS GOD DAMN BUZZING SOUND... BZZZ....BZZZ...BZZZ... NOW I HEAR THIS BITCH ASS BEEPING SOUND FROM ALL THESE SURVEILLANCE CHIPS YALL HAVE VIOLATED AND RAPED MY BODY WITH (BEEP.. BEEP..BEEP..BEEP..BEEP)! WHY DON’T YALL LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE AND JUS LET ME SLEEP?! GIVE ME SOME DECENT FOOD! STOP BEATING EVERYBODY! STOP STARVING ME! QUIT SPRAYING THAT GAS! QUIT STEALING MY BABIES AND MY DNA! QUIT ALL THIS HOE ASS SHIT YALL ARE DOING! YALL DID IT TO MY GRANDFATHER AND MY FATHER, AND NOW ME! WELL YALL WON’T KILL ME!! And he’ll go on.
Even in his insanity I see his hope, and willingness to resist. Sometimes listening to that brings tears to my eyes, tears of sadness and pain, and tears of love and rage: Love because I ache, because I wish I could take it away, his torture and pain at the hands of the state that have pushed him into psychosis. And rage because at times I feel helpless because I can’t do anything, and yet rage at the fact that as long as this oppression and murder exists and continues to perpetuate itself, I will continue to fight, because I refuse to lose my sense of self. This state-induced oppression and murder is unacceptable because oppression and murder only adds to oppression and murder. Thus why I will continue to LOVE and RAGE on! For peace, love, justice and solidarity in the world.
Some people reading this may perhaps feel that I am angry. When I speak of revolution, sometimes it’s an angry thought, but revolution is simply change. We all want change; change can come from other means besides violence. To act in violence by killing or oppressing people only means to give up hope on each other and if we are to live together, we must always keep trying. Societies are intended to maintain the greatest good for the greatest number of people. But we often forget everyone else, and if we do that we further separate ourselves from each other and only stunt our growth as human beings.
By sharing my experiences and realities here, I hope to give some understanding. Just as I’ve read of others experiences it has helped me to understand my own as a human being and as a Latino in this country that much more.
Some of my writings express anger that is common amongst prisoners, amongst all oppressed peoples both in the free world, prison and death row, but anger is never a bad thing if it comes from somewhere, but even when we feel anger it is all generated from a caring feeling. It is difficult to get upset over anything unless you first appreciate that “something” to begin with. If you simply get angry because of a person’s skin color, class or gender and want to oppress and murder them – that is hate.
I can only hope that as you read my section of writings, as well as my other comrades, that you keep an open mind. Think of what you know about the struggles of the oppressed of the world and try to relate them to your own struggles. If you do that, hopefully you can feel what I felt when I wrote my writings, as well as my comrades’ writings.
Love and Rage!!!
Speaking of the Dead
"There's only one thing worse than speaking ill of the dead--and that is not speaking of the dead at all" --Author Unknown
One of the most popular reasons given for upholding the "Death Penalty" is its value as a deterrent to violent crime. Those well-worn statistics have proven that not to be the case. Most often, within a very short time after someone is sentenced to death, the public no longer remembers who the condemned person is , cannot readily name even the victim or circumstances of the crime. Following are two of the many people murdered by the state of Texas. How many will remember these men or their alleged victims? Have the murders of these men has any deterrent affect at all on violent crime? (see my article "The Death Penalty")
Luther Hill: Luther Hill was tried and convicted of pouring gasoline on his wife, setting her on fire and burning her to death in 1941. He was murdered by the state on July 5, 1942. Considering that Luther was an African American man living in the South in the 1940s, one can easily assume that the only reason he ever made it to the inside of a courtroom and then to a prison cage, was because his alleged victim was an African American woman. If he had killed a white woman, or even been accused of or merely suspected of it. Luther would have found himself swinging from the limb of a tall oak tree! That was and still is what is proudly called by some, "Justice--Texas Style." One needs only to recall the atrocity enacted in 1998 in Jasper, Texas, when James Byrd was tortured to death at the hands of a few young white Ku Klux groupies to realize that not much has changed.
Raymond Hamilton: I know many people probably recognize Raymond's name because he was a partner with Clyde Barrow and Bonnie Parker, but not because his execution has served as any kind of deterrent to murder or made the world a safer place. Few, if any, will remember the actual crime for which he was sentenced to death or the name of his victim, or that he killed a guard during an escape from the infamous Eastham Unit. Raymond is also remembered by some for having escaped death row at the Walls Unit on July 22, 1934. In October 1934, the Texas Court of Criminal Appeals dismissed his appeal "because he escaped from prison, and did not return voluntarily, and was not recaptured within 30 days of his escape." He was captured eventually, though not in time to fall under the "30-day rule" and benefit from any appeal on his death sentence. ("Texas is awfully fond of 30-day rules.") He was executed on May 10, 1935.
These are only two men who have been executed. Since the death penalty was abolished in 1972 because the form of execution (The Electric Chair) was considered cruel and unusual punishment, and then reinstated in 1976 after the new form of murder became Lethal Injection (as if there is really a humane and just way to murder someone--that is insanity)
